Consumer Products
Look, I don’t want to sound ungrateful towards capitalism, but sometimes, we’ve got too many choices in consumer products. A few years ago, my girlfriend introduced me to a Neutrogena moisturizer that was so much better in every respect than any moisturizer I’d ever used, including within their own brand. Instead of elation, all I could feel was anger. If you put 10,000 options on the shelves of CVS, it will take me until I’m 24 to discover the best option! And there is one best option - anyone I’ve introduced this moisturizer to has immediately switched to this product. It’s not a question of taste - this shit has mass appeal, but it’s hidden in plain sight!
And then the other day, when struggling to clean the bathtub, we tried, as a last-ditch attempt, one of these so-called “magic eraser” sponges. Well it turns out they fucking effortlessly clean the bathtub. WHY DO YOU SELL OTHER BATHTUB CLEANING PRODUCTS!? None of them work as well. NONE OF THEM! But since so many of them sucked, I’ve wasted hours of my life cleaning grime from bathtubs when it could have taken all of five minutes.
Seriously though, stop trying to sell me bullshit. It turns me off of buying products, when a product does exist that serves me needs. But I can never find them amongst the bullshit, and eventually I stop buying things altogether because I’m so pissed I can’t find the one that works.
That’s my rant for today. GET YOUR ACT TOGETHER, JOHNSON AND JOHNSON. Only try to sell me your good products, for fuck’s sake.